Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
