I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I think I won the penis lottery.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
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