I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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