on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
You coming home soon, man?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...