Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
love makes seman taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize