Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
