Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
