How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize