So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
