The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
