I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
