is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
so much tequila, so little girl.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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