Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
