If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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