You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
the raccoons are back...
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