Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
