You can't motorboat a personality
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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