hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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