I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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