If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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