Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
