if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i can't believe i had my finger in that
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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