Kiss
Puke
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
