I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
