Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
