I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
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