i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
