Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
