I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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