Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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