writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."