you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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