i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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