Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
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