If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
