i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
