His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
