How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize