its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize