me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize