I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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