Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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