And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize