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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.

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  These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (612): View more from Minnesota

  the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...

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• (253): View more from Washington

  Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.

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  25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Daily.

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.

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• (239): View more from Florida

  They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.

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