Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize