Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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