I just pynch a tree in the face
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize