Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
