so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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