normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
