Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
